My father recently passed away, and although there are many profound aspects to this experience, the one I want to share today is one of impact. I was filled with love as people reached out to me in all sorts of ways to share the impact my father had on their lives.
“There were always laughs at the meetings he chaired.”
“He was always playing pranks at work and making us laugh.”
“I remember as a young kid playing at your farm and your Dad was always smiling.”
“I remember learning to play cards with your Dad and he was always so patient and encouraging.”
And the stories kept piling in. While anyone that knows me well, knows that my love and devotion to my father already ran deep, hearing these stories opened me up to a deeper appreciation and love for the way in which my father had lived his life and lifted others. I knew how much I loved and respected my father, but I honestly had no idea how many fond memories filled with love and respect that others held of him too.
This got me thinking. A lot.
What if I had heard these stories even before my father passed away? What would be the impact on how much I was able to love and support my father in his wonderful life? What would it look like if I shared my gratitude and appreciation for the friends and family in my life, with their friends and family? Would my friend’s children see their Mom in a whole new light when I share with them how amazing her timing is for knowing when I need a hug, even when I don’t reach out? Would my cousins have a whole new appreciation for their parents when I share with them what rocks their parents have been for our family over the past few years especially? Would my friend’s husband see his wife in a whole new way when I tell him that her ability to dive into deep play with me in the woods has fulfilled life-long dreams for how much I could laugh with, love and appreciate sister-friends?
My whole body flooded with warmth at the thought, and I committed in that moment to sharing impact, not only with the people who have impacted me, but with their loved ones too. I love the idea of living in a world of appreciation and love. Would you join me?
3 steps to sharing impact:
- Notice what the other person is saying or doing with or for you.
- Reflect back to them what you heard, or experienced – either in your own words, or paraphrasing.
- Share how hearing/experiencing that makes you feel, and how it has affected you.
It’s that simple!
It may look something like this:
“Honey, when you sent me a last minute invite for dinner on Sunday evening, my whole body relaxed knowing that someone else was taking care of my need for nourishment, and that you cared about me and what I’m going through. I can’t tell you how much it means to me to feel cared for right now.”
“When you made me coffee this morning, I got all tingly and free-feeling inside, knowing that this simple act you did, included thinking about me and wanting to support me. I thrive as a result of your support, in all the ways that you show it!”
I invite you to think of three examples of people or experiences you had in the last 24 hours that had an impact on you and share it with the person who was a part of these experiences. Bonus points if you want to take it a step further and share the impact this person has had on you with their loved ones too!
Enjoy the feeling of love and appreciation multiplied and be ready to allow it to come back to you as well.
p.s. I gave more examples in this video here.